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Correspondence from Frieda Harris to Aleister Crowley
[partial]
[22 December 1939]
. . . Has it occurred to you that the Censor is holding his [Karl Germer] letters? Both of you are uncertain friends of England! Someone not understanding what either of you are saying may have docketed letters "suspect" and they lurk in a locker to be re-examined. . . .
. . . as usual you have stated your case lucidly & beautifully & convincingly & everything you say is apparently true. . . .
. . . Thank you for Mahomet. I didn't want to read about him, he always seems so tawny & noisy & blah! to me tho I have never really read of him 'to attend' as the saying is. What I wanted, was what A.C. thought about him & where he fitted in the pattern of A.C.'s Persian Carpet of a mind, so that I could place him better myself. Question 'Was he a Master or a Merchant?' I think that was answered by you. . . .
. . . Now I don't make this up & I have always seen this even before I moved with the wrong set. If I ever have got off this planet, it is in a World where there are no human figures—I have never encountered one. Now I have wanted to very much and believed what you all tell me, but I can't. My gods have no human forms, only curves, angles & light, movement, colour and sound & when I draw, the moment I fall on one that is familiar to me I bend the knee and shout Holy! Holy! Holy! the have no moral sense; they are neither good nor bad, only inevitable and therefore right in the true sense & I believe they are gods. Therefore the human form is, to me, only one aspect, and the gods and goddesses could be done just as well in Giraffes, in fact better for me, as the Giraffe's bosom moves. . . .
. . . when I am lucky enough to push open the door of vision, there are no earths, stars, no moons, no holy angels or holy devils, no words, only movement, light & form & inexpressible glory.
I have not made this up to make you think or myself believe that I am either clever or mystical, at least I don't think I have, I may have!—but I didn't when I was 6 years old surely?
Do you think there was ever "a woman satisfied"? Here it is clearly Justice who requires satisfying.
I will keep myself to myself & attempt the smirking damsel & shall find it interesting. Equilibrium is full of possibilities for the pattern-maker but are we or not going to keep the aviary. Respondez s'il vous plait, as we can't shoo them out of the coop at the last moment, painted, as they will be, in my usual indelible manner humph!
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